AN APP TO YAP

When I go for a walk alone, I find people either chattering away on mobiles or to their companions. So, I ring my few remaining friends (family just plain ignore my calls!) and always manage them to catch them at a wrong time – one is watching a show, another is with a client, another is in the bathroom!

The cell phone is now a functioning part of our body like the heart or kidney and with a breezy ‘Catch you later’ I am dismissed. I give up and decide to listen to music but after a while it gets boring. And that’s when it strikes me – I wish there was an app that I could download as I walk alone.

Let’s call him ‘Giri’ the Indian male counterpart to ‘Siri’ (the tech app which gives you all the info you need). You talk and ‘Giri’ listens and is programmed to intelligently respond to breaks in the conversation with an interested “Hmmm” or a lively interjection of “Is that so?” when you pause to catch a breath.

Because, let’s face it – most of us have a lot to say and would rather talk than listen. And admit it, who isn’t fed up with the one- sided conversations with our silent half as they are engrossed with anything other than our scintillating conversation? I would love to be able to pour out my feelings to an app and not be held accountable for anything I say.

If we can have fitness apps, social media apps, shopping apps then why hasn’t some genius come up with an app we can talk to? Call it Yap App and mark my words it will lead to fitter relationships not to mention fitter bodies and minds.

Over the ages people have begged for a sympathetic ear (Mark Antony) and some have even lopped off their ear swayed by passion (Van Gogh). Humans need ears – to listen to them. It’s all very well for  Bridget Jones to write in her diary but today it is all about talking, walking and not so much writing.

Momma’s want to talk and not to old, deaf Poppa’s but to a kindred spirit and sometimes friends just cannot be found.

So c’mon you guys – don’t let this plea fall on deaf ears!

Nimmou Nilakantan