MOTHER’S DAY MUSINGS….
Being a Mother is the toughest job on earth they say…
Firstly, it is NOT a job – a calling, a blessing, a gift, a spiritual journey, a pain in the ass but definitely NOT a job! There is no 9-5 and it is all work from home. Long before Covid struck and sent the world and its workforce into a collective moan about having to work from home – our Moms were doing just that! They were on call 24/7 and none of them were on Zoom.
There was no pay or big fat bonus for their work nor any days off to jet into the Maldives and post on Instagram that letting down of hair and hanging out with buddies…full time Moms got no pay, no vacay and an endless run of bad hair days. Forget letting it down – it remained a crow’s nest till baby took its first steps and after that it lay in forlorn bunches in the bathroom drain as Mom ran after her toddler. And, just when it regained its former luster and bounce the first pimple appeared and the cycle was on START once again…
‘Old Age’ and ‘full time’ Moms had it tough compared to the ‘New Age’ Mom also known by her many monikers – Super woman, master juggler, career girl, time management guru, multi-tasker par excellence, media savvy and sourcing the best help during working hours, genius. Old age Mom also multi-tasked but alas without a title, pay or media support she had to find comfort where she could.
She cooked (no Swiggy, Zomato, Door dash or cook/nanny reporting for daily duty) cleaned, cribbed, comforted, counselled, co-ordinated – the list of ‘C’s’ were endless but she would never get the title of CEO – title poor but work rich!
And yet, when this generation of kids brought up by these ‘jobless’ mothers became super successful in their chosen field and multi-billionaires they first invariably thanked their Moms and expressed their heartfelt gratitude and love for this one person whose love and nurturing made it possible.
Today I am proud that my sons became kind and loving humans and successful working professionals (if I had a daughter, ditto!) I did not work when they were growing up – to me being a Mom was hard work and yes there were days when I would fall apart at the enormity and pressure and isolation of motherhood. I would wish I had a paying job, or hang out with adults or got lots of pats on my back for what I did but on my low days it was always a smile that put me back on the rails, a hug, a ‘I love you Ma’ whispered in my ear or an innocent kiss planted on my face.
I am grateful and blessed that I did not have to be the bread winner of the family or have to supplement the income by getting a job as so many Moms of today. A big salute to all those Moms who raised fine kids and worked full time jobs. But, I say this again – Motherhood is NOT a job.
You cannot put a price on a feeling and you cannot calculate the cost of the most valuable emotion of the heart – love. And, that is what being a Mom is –pure love without the bells and whistles – my mother taught me that. And, I wouldn’t trade that lesson or that feeling for the world….
HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY
Nimmou Nilakantan
May 8th2022
