WOGA

WOGA

It’s all about fusion folks! And Yoga, an age-old practice has borne the brunt of it. It has donned the avatar of a modern exercise form to suit every need and body type. From unrolling a mat and using your body to bend in every possible way you can now do Yoga in saunas (Soga), on paddle boards (Poga), with your pet pooch (Doga), on a monkey’s back or in a bat cave, while chugging beer (Boga) and call it whatever you want as long as it ends with ‘oga’…

Or you could just glug beer and call it pubbing but then where is the virtue in that? Anyway, after many drinks, with or without the ‘oga’ we do obtain a kind of Yogic nirvana without contorting our bodies into some Asana – unless we are flat out under the table – also known as ‘Savasasana’ (the dead pose).

It’s a given that nobody has any time to spare – so we are forced to multi-task even while exercising. Multi-task, fusion, whatever but here’s what works for me – WOGA. It is ‘Walking Yoga’ and it’s a doozie.

So, this is how it works- I walk briskly while breathing naturally but this is where I incorporate the ‘oga’- by holding one nostril shut and exhaling from the other. Normally I would pinch both nostrils shut while walking to shut out the stench of garbage and open drains but then it’s not WOGA. It’s all about walking AND breathing slowly through one nostril and expelling air through another…

Yoga in its pure form is silent except for the noisy exhalations and the loud utterance of “OM” said with varying degrees of intensity while rising to a crescendo and fading to a slow “mmm”. This is easily done in WOGA.

As I walk, I draw in a big breath into my big belly naturally and then I let it all out in a powerful blast of  “Ohhhhmmmmm”. This takes about ten strides during which my walking companion has scooted into another route with his hands over his ears. Other walkers keep a respectful 10 feet of distance from me which is what I wanted anyway.

Having carved out my own personal space in a public park I feel smug in my take on Yoga. I happily inhale and exhale my thunderous ‘ohmm’s’ and watch with ascetic detachment as a startled bird takes flight.

And that’s all there is to it – WOGA – the essence of Yoga compressed into its essential component – breathing and my addition of breathing with sound effects.

Asanas are for the body but yoga is about the spirit. And nothing lifts the spirit as much as walking and breathing in symphony. Next on the agenda is HOGA – getting husband to bend to my will. Watch this space…

Nimmou Nilakantan

'BEING ANIMAL'

‘BEING ANIMAL’

‘Being Human’ is overrated- no matter which famous personality espouses this as a worthy endeavor or no matter how many T-shirts with those two words emblazoned across the front sell, the fact remains the same- being human sucks! Let me list the many virtues of ‘Being Animal’…

Animals do not have a boastful bone in their body. They just go about doing what they are meant to do – survive! A human always has an agenda – put down other humans to feel powerful. What are the specific areas that we can laud ‘Being Animal’ more than ‘Being Human’?

PARENTING

Humans just cannot let go. Long past their sell by date a parent will try to be an integral part of their children’s lives manipulating the bond under the guise of love, duty and kinship. Learn from an animal – once it has taught it’s kid the basics of survival it leads its own life and does not relive the past or flog the future. Be Animal and LET GO! It ensures the legacy of a better species of Human…

ACCEPTANCE

‘Being animal’ you do not ever pass judgment on one of your kind. That is uniquely ‘Being Human’. An elephant would never ostracize or isolate one of its kind because it felt they did not measure up. You have to only watch Nat Geo or Discovery or any other Nature channel on T.V to realize that every species of animal live together with one agenda – survival. And, they do whatever it takes to live in harmony to ensure their common goal. ‘Being Human’, not only are we divided over caste, creed or colour, we also hone in on petty differences like weight, height, shape etc. Can you imagine a tiger ‘fat shaming’ one of its kind? Or a zebra counting how many more stripes another zebra has? Or an elephant comparing the length of it’s trunk? You get my drift? Superficialities are the bane of a human’s existence…

SUPPORT

If a lion attacks a Cape Buffalo it has to make darn sure that it picks an isolated or a weak one in the herd. Otherwise it runs the risk of being trampled or gored by the others which come charging to the rescue of their stricken brethren. That is ‘Being Animal’ – rushing to the aid of a fellow creature no matter the personal risk to itself. ‘Being Human’ does not have such a strict ‘Support your Bro Code’ – it is a random throw of the dice more dependent on a stray spark of humanity than a strict norm. In recent times, especially in India, ‘Being Human’ entails cell phones being whipped out at the scene of an accident and gruesome recordings circulated for viewing.

GENDER DISCRIMINATION

You see the male of the animal kingdom lovingly build a nest for its mate. Why, some fish even change sex to give birth to their young! The ostrich will guard the egg with its life, while some male birds will sit on the egg till it hatches. There are no roles based on gender – whatever ensures survival is the role that is adopted – whether a provider or a beneficiary, there is a beautiful coalescing of the core need – to exist as a harmonious unit. And this transcends across every species of animal on land, sea or air. ‘Being Human’ especially in a country like India (sadly, the unique distinction, again!) one thing is very clear. The peacock human male struts and harasses the human peahen trying to denigrate her role into the silent, weaker half. Have you ever seen a female hippo being eve teased? Or a female giraffe forced to sit in a corner, hidden from sight, relegated to the role of a cook and cleaner only? Or the female of any species made to feel inferior, the way we humans do?

EQUALITY

‘Being animal’ does not relegate you to a role based on gender. Your role is defined purely by your skill set. In a pride, the male lion marks his territory while the lioness makes the kill having honed her hunting skills to perfection. Go figure!

‘Being Animal’ entails accepting your role and being true to nature. ‘Being Human’ has deviated so far off course that we have to remind ourselves to BE HUMAN and make it a cause.

This doomsday scenario was beautifully encapsulated in the verse of a famous poet many centuries ago. He wrote-

‘If this belief from Heaven sent

If such be Nature’s Holy plan

Have I not reason to lament

What Man has made of Man?

And no, I am not going to name the poet. Google it- ‘Being Human’ has a few advantages….

Nimmou Nilakantan

TYRES IN THE MUD

When does communication become soul destroying? When there is no conversation! During a conversation, one conveys something! By merely churning out words communication becomes like a car tyre stuck in the mud. You can accelerate all you want but the wheel just spins spraying mud everywhere.

If there is no emotion, no warmth, no empathy or humour in a conversation, then you are not communicating – you are just a tyre in the mud – splattering boredom, breeding resentment and misunderstanding to the receiver of your garbled message.

Everything in life has a purpose and a shelf life. Especially relationships! We marry for so many reasons – companionship, love or to have children. That is the sole purpose of sharing time, space and resources with another human. Sometimes it works and sometimes it runs its course and expires because it has reached the end of its shelf life and the purpose is no longer valid.

A relationship with a parent is much the same. Though the bond with your child is strong, however much you love each other, they become the parallel track in your life as they become adults. Though they might run alongside, your life and theirs can never converge into a single track – that separation happened at birth and remains so until death.

Having a long conversation with a parent just to ‘unload’ one’s grievances achieves only one purpose – it stunts the relationship. A parent is not a counsellor especially when the counsel or advice they give is ignored. Parents are not geared to be the sole repository of wrong choices and when a communication is based solely on the needs of one, then conversation is nothing but a futile grinding of gears with nothing moving forward.

Expecting a spouse to serve one’s wants, expecting a parent to be of support long past the age of requiring it, wanting a friend to assume the role one desires based on one’s own needs – all these are just tyres churning the mud.

If this happens to you – you have to call a time out. Otherwise you become the mud and every revolution of that tyre that is going nowhere will only grind you deeper and deeper into that muck. When this happens, there is only one thing to do – grab the wheel, change gears and zoom away….

Nimmou Nilakantan