PARENTS ARE PEOPLE TOO!
Everywhere, you have groups who take up cudgels for the weak
and worthy. You have PETA for animals and I have just formed mine called PAPT- Parents Are People Too! Just a little
reminder or rather a spoiler alert for all those ungrateful offspring that God
did not put us on earth solely to sacrifice our entire life for the well being
of our children once they have become adults. So, here is the list as a
reminder, that parents, especially mothers, were not put on earth only to
‘nurture’ (read pander to every whim and fancy) of their offspring and not all
were named Theresa....
SPOILER ALERT #1
Your Dad is not an ATM though countless T-shirts with that
cheeky slogan have set the cash registers ringing. Make your own money and
spend that. Filial love does not extend to funding outlandish dreams, buying
expensive gifts or giving a false sense of entitlement at the risk of Dad’s
‘fiscal’ health.
SPOLER ALERT #2
Your mom’s higher calling was not just to fill that empty
well that masquerades as your stomach. Once you turn 21, learn to cook! That
way you do not need to banish your poor mom with a ladle in her hand to that
hot hell hole she escaped from the day you left home. She has since joined a
Bird Watching group and so far has not yet spotted one aged bird feeding it’s
adult progeny a single worm leave alone a gourmet meal! The nest is empty and
the kitchen is closed- get it?
SPOILER ALERT #3
Your parents are not a confession booth nor are they a
garbage chute. Confess to your priests all those misdeeds- your Dad is not
ordained nor is he interested in every little bump in your life. As for your
mom- the maternal ear would rather hear the soulful rendering of a 'bhajan'
rather than all that whining about bad food or the endless commute Go directly
to Facebook and share with those virtual friends- all 867 of them...
SPOILER ALERT #4
Our heart leaps up when we behold a rainbow in the sky, a
little puppy or a freshly baked cake made by somebody else. It plummets when
you give us the ‘good news’ that your plans for a holiday involve camping in
the parental home that you could not wait to leave as a teenager. Suddenly, we
have assumed new and infinitely more appealing avatars- cooks, babysitters,
fund managers and innkeepers. No, no, no, no, no ,no! Yes, we parents love
seeing you children and your children in any place on earth but our own house.
So, let’s fix that neutral venue where one person is not catering to the needs
of a dozen others- also called a hotel...
SPOILER ALERT#5
Stop holding us hostage to those imagined childhood
injustices. Okay, okay, we were monster parents but still in spite of all the
scolding’s, slaps (truly sorry for those pinches) and implanting that gigantic
chip on your shoulders. But, still, miracle of miracles, in spite of all that
bad parenting, all of you turned out into decent, law abiding citizens. Nobody
was maimed or scarred so laying that emotional burden on our doorstep just
ain’t gonna work. That guilt trip has been undertaken and the charges have been
dismissed for lack of any discernible evidence. Here is an idea for redemption-
try being the perfect parent. If the shoe fits, wear it and walk in it...
SPOILER ALERT #6
Here’s a newsflash- we do
have a name other than Amma, Ma, Mom, Mamma and though we love being called
that do remember that we were not christened Ma or Pa. Our parents called us
darling, sweetie, pumpkin, honey, chellam- all the names we call you (plus a
few unprintable one’s when goaded) and what you will call your kids. All we
ask, no implore, sorry, beg you is to remember we have an identity that goes
with our given names and mom is the moniker that came with parenthood...
SPOILER ALERT #7
And this most important of them all- before we became
parents, we were, hold your breath, husband and wife AND (cue drum roll) we
were happy! You kids were icing on the cake but before you’ll arrived life was
pretty damn good with just cake too! Do keep that in mind when bringing up your
own kids- you can have your cake and eat it too! Happy Parenting...
Nimmou Nilakantan
(Mom, darling and Nimmou)
